It's September and I Hope it's Snake Free!

Yahoo! September 1st means we're closer to Autumn! I have been anxiously awaiting September just so I could be close to Autumn--my very best friend. It's not as if it would immediately put a halt to the heat of summer but a girl can wish and hope, can't she? I know we can still hit 100 in September but we're 10 hours and 20 minutes into September now and I must say, "So far so good!" 

It also means no more varmints!! About a month ago, I was taking the dogs out on leashes one by one because it had rained and I didn't want them running all over the place. I'm bringing the third dog in, Mitzi, when I look down and right next to the door is this ugly, scary intruder! 

Where was it when I took the last two dogs out? I didn't see it then. Under the grill perhaps? George killed it with a post hole digger and we threw it over the back fence.

Four days later, I'm out with all three dogs. Daisy is on a leash but Sally and Mitzi are loose. 

 I look down and see this nightmare!

It was about two yards away, stretched out long, and looking right at me! My heart tried to come out through my mouth but I gulped it back down and tried not to alert the dogs. Daisy saw it though and was trying to pull me toward it. Sally and Mitzi hadn't noticed it.

I'm thinking, "Okay, how do I get the three of them past this snake and back into the house without them noticing it."

I knew if they saw it, they'd go for it. All for different reasons too. Daisy would attack immediately because she's like that. Her motto is attack first and ask questions later. Sally would look like she was attacking but once she's right there face-to-face with the snake, she'd bark A LOT, jump back, and try to stay out of its way. She'd navigate between barking and jumping back. Mitzi would go for friendship.

After a moment of planning, I scooped up Daisy under one arm and grabbed Sally by the collar. I pulled her past the snake all the while holding Daisy as she squirmed under my arm. It was not an easy task. Sally, being a keen and alert terrier, originally bred to kill varmints, never noticed the snake even though she was within a yard or so from it while I was dragging her past it. Good dog! Mitzi was farther away from where we were so I left her there and put those two in the house. Then, I went back, got Mitzi, and put her inside too.

George was at work 
so he couldn't kill it. 

 That left me with two choices;

1) Leave it alone and worry that it's lurking every time I step out the back door, OR

2) Kill it!

I didn't think it was a poisinous snake but I wasn't sure. 

 In any event, 

I despise snakes!

So, I killed my 1st snake and last snake! Never again. George killed that little bitty wormy wimpy thing four days ago. What an amatuer! This snake was huge!

I beat it to death with the same post hole digger George used four days earlier. He put the snake on the patio and poked it's head open with the edge of the digger.

Not me! I stood up on the patio as far away from it as I could get. With my first hit, it darted under a nearby crepe myrtle bush. Man, was that sucker fast too! I repeatedly hit it, and hit it, and hit it, and hit it, with the post hole digger. (I think I damaged the crepe myrtle but I don't care.) It took about 40 hits before it was dead. Those suckers are thick and hard skinned! It was a very creepy, awful experience but I did it!  

After it was dead, I scooped it up on the end of a rake and headed toward the back fence so I could throw it over. The backyard was muddy in spots which makes it slippery and the wind was blowing too. I had flip flops on and the rake pointed straight out in front of me with the snake dangling off the end.

I'm trying to navigate the path slowly so I won't fall but I'm having visions of falling down like in a cartoon. The snake flies up in the air and comes crashing down on top of me, wraps around my neck, yanks me real fast so that I'm rolling in circles! You know--as if you're starting a yo-yo with a lawnmower puller thingy, and I'm the yo-yo! Then (still a cartoon), my body takes off in a frenzy and mows the entire lawn! I hate it when that happens.

I also noticed the wind was blowing in my direction and the snake was swaying with it right towards me. As it did, the yo-yo/lawnmowing visions were becoming even more exaggerated! Now that darn snake has me mowing with such power that I'm flying through the fence and mowing the neighbor's yard too! I only hope I don't have to be restarted!

Oh please Lord, 

let me make it to the fence?!

So, I'm moving at a snail's pace across the backyard with this snake on a rake. (Not to be confused with soap on a rope!) I'm still holding the rake straight out in front of me, and as far away from me as I can possibly hold it. Did I mention this was tough on the arms after awhile? Well, it was.

Once I get to the section of trees in the back, there's a hill to go up! It's a wet, muddy, slippery hill. I never noticed how big this hill was before! It looks exactly like Mt. Everest. Spittin' image! The visions were quite enhanced at this point but I persevered. Through blood, sweat, tears, and a prayer, I made it up Mount Everest and threw the snake over the fence. VICTORY WAS MINE! Ahaaaaah!

This is how it landed after I threw it over the fence. It was gone the next morning. Not a trace. I guess the hawks had a dinner party that night.

Moving onto other people's varmints. A couple of weeks ago, when we went to Linda and David's pool party (see the previous post), Linda greeted us with these lovely little treasures.

Treasure #1 ~ The scorpion.
It's in a jar so it's hard to see.
The line under it shows how long it is.

She found this scorpion in their bed! It was crawling on David and stung him but it didn't sting him enough to really hurt because he flung it off about the time it was stinging him. Since then, she found another one in the house. It was in her hallway. She's doing good so far this year. Last year, she found SEVEN in her house! They figured out how they're getting in and are in the process of fixing it! I'd probably do the easy thing and move!

Treasure #2 ~ A rattlesnake!

David killed it about 15 minutes before we arrived. It was in the corner of the yard near where they play horseshoes. David kills them like George. Notice that the neck is cut at the head.So, you can probably see that this is another reason (besides the heat) that I'm looking forward to Autumn.

Now on to something more pleasant. Guess what I'm doing today?

Painting the kitchen!
Yes, I've decided to paint,
declutter, clean and reorganize.

Notice the window A/C unit? Our A/C went out. George is in the process of moving the house unit to the shop and we're buying a new unit for the house. In the meantime, we have this window unit and one in the bedroom. We hope to have the real thing within another week or so.

Most items have been
removed and I'm ready to go!

Here I go!

Painting and Smiling!
D~~~~